By 26...

Life is a 2 lane road that travels 1 direction.

The direction is North, South, East, and West. 

I know it's confusing... it's life.

~Levi Arnone

It has been over a year since my last blog post. I’m sorry to those of you who follow and expect more from me, I would like to be more consistent. However, I do not want to fill my blog with meaningless posts just to meet a monthly quota.

For those of you who have been following, or have read my posts before, you will know each post has a certain ‘feel’. I try to convey that feel through my writing in a passionate way. Hence why I don’t post often. I have to feel passionate about what I’m writing, or it is difficult to get my point across.

Well, the time has come. I have had this topic on my mind for a few weeks and I cannot seem to escape it. This only means one thing… write it down.

I think many of us, if not all, have a ‘plan’ as we mature and get older. For many this ‘plan’ can come as early as middle school, some in high school, many in college, and others after that. Hell, some of us still don’t have a ‘plan’.

When I refer to a ‘plan’ I’m specifically talking about how we envision our future life. In a way, we are setting a loose goal and vision of exactly how we want things to go. It’s basically a rough draft of our life as we progress down this path called LIFE. Some of us may write our ‘plan’ on paper, others talk about it, and for some it’s all in our head.

This is a small outline of my ‘plan’, or so I thought. Mine started to build around age 18 when I was about to head off to college. It went something like this: Finish my Bachelor’s degree, land a great job, and start my MBA. Be married by 26, have a couple of children. Build a house, get some nice vehicles, a few fun toys. Have controllable debt (house payment and maybe car payment). Live happily.

Fast-forward.

Let me tell you, my ‘plan’ did not go according to plan. Some things were able to fall into place and my ‘plan’ was now becoming my reality. Today, here I am, 26 years old. I have finished my Bachelor’s degree but never started my MBA. I’m nearing 4 years working for a great company. The rest… well, it never really happened.

The ‘plan’ that I had envisioned years ago never really happened. In fact, I’m glad it didn’t happen. I think society and the people around us shape our reality and tell us the way things “should” be. It’s okay not to follow in those footsteps, though. You don’t have to have a ‘plan’, you can make it up as you go. Blaze your own path and do the things you want to do, not the things you think you have to do. The things you wanted at age 16 you may not want at age 20. The things you want at age 20 may not be what you want at age 25.

Today I’m still deciding; do I want to be married? Do I want to have kids? Do I want to go back to school and get an MBA? Do I want to build a house, or live in a big ass van and travel around? Will I ever switch jobs? These are all things I’ve questioned recently that I never thought I would have at age 18.  

I never pictured my plan being something like this: Get my Bachelor’s degree, get a good job. Start skydiving and jumping off other high objects. Spend large amounts of money on parachutes and wingsuits. Selling my truck and motorcycle to downsize; put Jeep up for sale. Start working in the skydiving industry to support my hobby. Be in a series of relationships, some good some bad. Start going bald (definitely not planned). Figure out what I’m doing with my life…

There is nothing good or bad about this. There isn’t a right or wrong way to do things. It is simply an observation I’ve made when I look back and say, “By 26 I…” and realized so much of it never happened.

Now I’m working on my next ‘plan’… “If I live to see 30…” ;)

When you’re me, you think about it.

My Kind Of Beautiful

My kind of beautiful doesn't have blonde hair; blue eyes.  She can't always be found on the catwalk at a local fashion show.

My kind of beautiful doesn't wear designer clothes or drive the latest Lexus. She can't always be found with makeup on and her hair done up.

My kind of beautiful doesn't have brown hair; brown eyes. She doesn't waste her time trying to please others.

My kind of beautiful doesn't have a perfect face. She can't always be found twirling her hair around her finger.

My kind of beautiful doesn't know where the best tanning salon in town is. She likely doesn't have time to paint her nails.

My kind of beautiful doesn't have perfect teeth. She doesn't get caught up in others drama.

My kind of beautiful doesn't have a 'model' body. You won't always find her at the gym.

You see, my kind of beautiful is different.

My kind of beautiful loves adventure. She is open to new experiences.

My kind of beautiful prefers natural beauty. She already knows she is beautiful.

My kind of beautiful has nice clothes. She wears them on special occasions.

My kind of beautiful doesn't waste time pleasing others. She is too busy being herself.

My kind of beautiful can hold a conversation. She is passionate.

My kind of beautiful is intelligent. She is quintessential.

My kind of beautiful is glowing. She has been sun kissed.

My kind of beautiful has a perfect smile. She only has time for happiness.

My kind of beautiful is healthy. She is active in all walks of life.

My kind of beautiful has a sense of humor. She laughs at her mistakes.

My kind of beautiful is personality.

Personality...is beautiful.

Think about it...

I Didn't Think...

Didn't Think...

You always said I think too much
Why worry about the future and what you can't control

So I changed my ways to avoid the thoughts
 I was having every day

Thinking if I didn't think
You'd never go away

So I didn't think there would come a day
I couldn't kiss your lips

I didn't think there would be a day
I wouldn't hug you around the hips

I didn't think there would be a day
You'd say, let's just be friends

I didn't think it would end this way
Left sitting on the fence

I didn't think about things
I know I can't control...

So I didn't think I'd never see your smiling face

I didn't think you'd be looking for someone
To fill that empty space

So I didn't think I should have thought about thinking you would leave

But now you're gone; gone for good
And I am here alone

And now I wonder do you THINK of me
The answer is probably no

Because all along everything
Was under your control

So I changed my ways to think again
Now I miss you every day

The more I think, the more I know
I'm sad you went away.

Direction is Difficult

“So many people live within unhappy circumstances and yet will not take the initiative to change their situation because they are conditioned to a life of security, conformity, and conservatism, all of which may appear to give one peace of mind, but in reality nothing is more dangerous to the adventurous spirit within a man than a secure future. The very basic core of a man’s living spirit is his passion for adventure. The joy of life comes from our encounters with new experiences, and hence there is no greater joy than to have an endlessly changing horizon, for each day to have a new and different sun.”

- Jon Krakauer

Recently I had a conundrum in my life that I couldn’t seem to get passed. It wasn’t a major event or series of events that changed my outlook; but instead, a self-reflection. I looked at myself and those around me and asked, “Am I really happy?” This made my mind go crazy and reflect in more directions than I could comprehend at any given moment. Emotions began pouring through my body and mind as if it were a fast moving stream flowing through a plethora of pebbles and rocks. I found myself distracted by all of the different aspects; I couldn’t take one steady path and analyze it as I had hoped. The bulk of this feeling, coming from the lifestyle I’ve been living.

As I analyzed my situation further, I began to feel complacent. Nothing I seem to do has felt good enough for me, I feel as though I’m not progressing, changing; I’m becoming stagnant, almost, boring.

Any of you reading this that know me are probably thinking, “Levi… complacent?” It sounds absurd to them due to my lifestyle. To them, I’m always up to something; be it skydiving, scuba diving, rock climbing, mountain biking, hiking, etc. All of these things I participate in on a regular basis, but perhaps it is not as ‘regular’ as I’d like.

This becomes more apparent when I pull my career into the picture.  I love my job; the fact that I’m able to help thousands of people communicate each day is a very rewarding thing. I’ve been with my current company for 2 years now, and in my position for 1.5 years. I feel as if I’m stagnant because I haven’t experienced change in so long. My routine is just that, a routine. Which leads me to sit and wonder… isn’t there something more? Working thousands of hours a year in order to get a couple hundred hours to go to the place of my choosing; as money allows?

Even though work bounds the lifestyle I love, and limits my freedom. It is also a necessity in order for to be able to do the things I want to do. It all costs money. Fortunately, there is a way around it; becoming a professional athlete. It’s an extremely rare opportunity and only a small portion of individuals that have that dream, will get the opportunity to live it.

So where does one divide the line of living a life of adventure and prospering in this beautiful world that was put before us, and the realm of working to ensure you are secure, can retire, and continue living ‘the dream’? 

Balance seems to be the logical choice, and rightfully so, but it also comes with compromise. We can’t experience everything, and have nothing. Yet at the same time, we cannot have everything and experience nothing. It all depends on how you choose to allocate your recourses (money).

Being a well-rounded person is difficult. You want to have everything and do everything, but a dollar can only stretch so far. So you compromise doing things that others might do more often, or on a regular basis, and you accept that you find happiness in different ways. Some individuals want to have nothing to show for their money, but be rich in experiences and travel. Others want to have fancy cars and a big house, but never leave their comfort zone. Yet those who want a bit of everything, or are financially privileged, try to get a little bit of both.

It seems to me that this thought isn’t one that will go away any time soon. It’s something that I continue to search for in my life. More experiences, more toys, more friends, more traveling, more skills, more time, just….more. When you’re me, you think about it. 

Just [be]

"Do not bother just to be better than your contemporaries or predecessors. Try to be better than yourself." -Willam Faulkner

Well, it's been just over a month since I posted last. Since then my brain has been going crazy about what subject/hobby/bothersome issue to write about next. I think this one has been a long time coming. 

It's simply about, life. It's a truly amazing thing to be brought into this world by two individuals who were able to share something special. However, this post isn't about sex or making love. Like I said, it's about life. 

Those you of you who know me, know I'm a 'go-getter.' I don't sit around for things to be handed to me, I strive to move forward and work for what I want in life. Outside of career goals, needs, and wants; I try to live the same lifestyle. 

First, lets put career aspirations in focus. Far too often I see people sit around waiting for the next opportunity. They talk of a business they want to open, a product they want to develop, a store they want to manage, or a position they want to attain within their company. That's great! I will encourage and support them in whatever they choose. 

However, 98% of the time, it's all talk. Anyone can say they want to open a business, or design a product, etc. What sets people apart are the 'go-getters.'  What are you doing that the other guys aren't? How are you going to get there? Do you have a plan? Do you have a measurable goal? How long will it take? The list goes on. 

When I try to ask these questions, it's usually followed by a list of excuses. Don't have time? Make some. 

Don't have money? Work more, buy less, find an investor.

Don't have the motivation? Then you really don't want it. 

What it comes down to, is finding what makes you tick. What do you REALLY want, and how bad? If you find yourself making excuses, find a way to turn them around and MOVE FORWARD.  The worst thing for yourself is to become stagnant. I don't understand how people can sit around wasting their god given talents, 'waiting'  for what's to come. It doesn't have to be a competition, but rather a way of self improvement that we should strive for. 

So I guess my question is, why? Why don't people have the mindset to achieve something greater than themselves? Why are they happy being stagnant? Why are they comfortable living an 'average' life? Why do they lie to themselves?  Why can't they just...be? 

When you're me, you think about it. 

Just Words?

Here is a little poem I wrote over a month ago. It truly amazes me how highly people think of themselves, or how highly we think of others. In the opposite, how poorly we think of ourselves, or how poorly we think of others. We are all built up of the same matter and really aren't all that different. We are each amazing beings, and our communication practices are what divide us more than anything else. They aren't "just words."

You think you're perfect
I know you're not,
I think you're pretty
You think you're hot

You think you're flawless
But you're full of flaws,
What depicts perfect
Is what puts us in awe

So tell the story of being the same,
Boy and girls alike, still play the game
Find someone who matters and makes you feel whole
Because what truly loves you, will never let go.

Be careful...for the words we are taught, become the words they are not.

When you're me, you think about it.

Among Angels: Wingmen Earn Their Wings

“There are things that we don't want to happen but have to accept, things we don't want to know but have to learn, and people we can't live without but have to let go.” ~ Unknown

          Well, I know it’s been a while since I’ve been able to post on my blog, and I truly miss it. Life got so busy with school, work, and photography, that I’ve had no time to do something that I really love; writing. As many of you know, I’m not one to write about life events or what’s going on around me; rather, I write open your minds and try to expand the horizons on normal thought. However, an exception has been made for this blog post because of the impact it had on my life…the story follows.

            On Saturday, May 26^th, I lost one of the greatest friends a friend could ever ask for. Although, it wasn’t just one of the greatest friends, it was 4 of them.  This post is not intended to tell you what happened, but to recognize the 4 great individuals we lost on this day.

            I’d like to start with Tanner Holt, the one I knew least of the group…but felt like could relate too. I had met him a few times but never got the opportunity to hang out with him. Prior to his death I had heard so many great things about him, and I really wish I had made the time to get to know. I know from a close friend that he loved his nephew more than anything…and I’ve seen it in the pictures of them together.  Just like all the boys, he seemed like a very friend oriented person, and it’s tragic that we had to lose him.

            Colby Hafen, where do I even start? Another guy I am blessed to have known and grateful to have spent time with.  He was the oldest of the bunch but a kid at heart, really knew how to have a good time and treated everyone with respect. I remember our few trips to Mesquite and the laughter he would bring to the table, even those he didn’t even know. The first time I officially met Colby he said, “you know those girls you always see at the party that seem way cool and you wanna know them, but you just can’t get yourself to talk to them? Well…you’re that guy for me.” The smile it brought to my face can’t be duplicated. Just goes to show the kind of friend Colby was to everyone he encountered. I love you man, now introduce yourself to all the true angels we thought we’d find on earth.

            Jordan Chapman, the man lady’s wanted, and all the men wish they were. He had a smile that would light up the room and the personality to fit. As with all of these boys, I met him through friends and I am proud to call him a friend of my own. He had such a kind demeanor about him that is unmatched. He was so outgoing and I remember meeting him for the first time on a trip to Salt Lake, with him and Alex combined, I don’t think I will laugh that hard ever again.

            Alex Metzger, like a brother to me, and a friend to many. Alex….Alex, he was an original to say the least; the most amazing sense of humor that would brighten anyone’s day. He instantly became friends with anyone he came in contact with, especially the girls. He was always wanting everyone to have a good time, and I was one fortunate enough to have those good times with him. He came up with the most original words, phrases, and ways of going about the most dull subject. He’s the kind of person you can just look at, and laugh because of who he is, and how he is.

I was fortunate enough to talk to Alex the day before his death, and I’m proud to say the last words I said to him were, “Love ya man, have fun.” He had called to invite me with them in their travels, but unfortunately couldn’t join because I was up north on business. I keep thinking to myself that I wish I was on that plane with them, and if I were in town, I would have been. Being with them would be easier than having to miss them.  

They were all great wingmen, now they are all true wingmen. They lived for their friends, and have now died for them too. The brought so many people joy and love that will always be remembered and never be forgotten. They have brought an already close group of friends, even closer together. They have taught us all many lessons through their lives…most without knowing it. Now, in their passing, they taught us one more. Take each day, live it, breathe it, love it, cherish it, and spend it with the people who mean most; because just like that…it can be over.

In the words of Alex Metzger, “Live life as though when you die, it all starts over again.”

“While we are mourning the loss of our friend, others are rejoicing to meet him behind the veil.”  ~John Taylor